Sometimes, it is actually you who is the villain of the story.

God, I swear arguing with your conscience is the most humbling experience ever.

Any who, once upon a time in first year I stood up this boy.

I was bored and drunk, typical first-year behaviour during quarantine. When my alter ego, we’ll call her Patricia, came up with the amazing idea of writing ‘hi’ with post-it notes on my window. 

Never had I imagined that someone would write me back on their window. From there as you can imagine, we kept talking through post-it notes. 

I would put mine in the morning and he would respond at night. Quite cringe I know, but what can I say, I really thought I would be the next Taylor Swift in her song, ‘You Belong With Me’.

Three days and an unnecessary amount of post-it notes later, he asked me out. 

Which I said yes to, obviously. I mean, I was living my Cinderella dream, making up scenarios in my head of how this would be such a good story to tell my kids of how I met their dad. 

I know, so dramatic, like who is she? Definitely not me, I can tell you that. 

Anywho, once I agreed to our date, through post-it notes obvi, he asked for my snap.

And that’s when I came across my biggest fear.

He was BLONDE.

Now before you say anything, I know that looks are not everything, but we can all agree that someone’s looks do matter a lot.

I was still planning on going on the date, but I just knew I was not physically attracted to him, so nothing romantically would have happened between the two of us. 

Two days went by, then four, then a week. Our date was coming up but we hadn’t spoken at all since then. He didn’t text me, so I didn’t text him, why would I? Last time I checked it was the sperm chasing the egg, not the other way around. 

Then the big day came, but I didn’t know whether the date was still on or not. 

I mean none of us said anything, especially him, who planned it. So my first thought was that it wasn’t happening anymore. 

Was I upset? Honestly, no, in fact, I was a bit relieved cause I knew nothing would have happened. 

So, I just ordered myself some Domino’s and started watching a new film, when suddenly I received a text from him saying: 

“Hey, I’m here, are you near?”

Well, you can imagine what was going through my head. 

“Fuck,”  I said to myself. What should I do? 

I was nowhere near where he was, fuck, I didn’t even know where he was. 

So I did what everyone in my place would probably do, ignore it and consider it a tomorrow problem. 

In other words, I stood him up.

Did I mean it? Nah, not really, I was gonna go. 

Was it because he was blonde and I have a hatred for them? Maybe, but I was still going to go. 

If only he’d texted though…

Edited by Elena Baeza Ruso