Stuck in Relationship Limbo: Situationships and the Big ‘What Are We?’

by | May 23, 2023 | All about Love

Caught between love and labels? You are not alone.

Situationships, oh how much I love them!

I’m just kidding, I’ve just witnessed too many to the point that I’m starting to question the very foundation of modern romance.

And I’m sure you can relate.

We’ve all been in one, or at the very least have a front row seat to the drama unfolding in your friends’ lives.

What is a situationship?

Well, it’s when two people do all the relationship-y stuff, but without the labels, boundaries, or any hint of commitment.

It’s the grey area between causal dating and a full-fledged ‘Facebook official’ romance, or as some might like to refer to, the ‘What Are We’ phase.

It’s a bit like ordering a takeout and getting tomato dip instead of ketchup (nope, they are not the same thing) – frustrating and messy.

So, brace yourselves for some tales from the frontlines of situationship warfare.

Some of my friends have miraculously escaped the tangled web and found themselves in happy relationships and planning a future together with their lover boys.

Others, well, they’ve adopted Olivia Rodrigo’s Sour album as their breakup anthem and have a burn book for their not-really-exes.

Ah, the wonders of situationships! It’s like Russian roulette – you will either end up happily ever after or on the therapist’s couch.

Just like any ‘normal’ relationship, situationships require communication, even if it means facing THE dreadful talk.

And let’s be real, we’ve all done our best to avoid that conversation like avoiding THE sex talk with our parents.

Like, how do you approach the subject of ‘What Are We’ when you’re just as clueless as a goldfish?

What about the fear of rejection?

Is it a relationship you seek or just a casual fling?

And the big question, what do you want?

My dear friend Francesca Ferragni, who’ve already been there and done that, explained how being in a situationship was tough, but it was all worth it at the end.

She said: ‘I was lucky enough to be in a situationship with someone who was patient and gave me the time I needed to figure out my feelings and emotions.

‘And since then we have been inseparable.’

Now, I think I can speak for a lot of people when I say that that question feels like a 1000-piece puzzle without the picture as reference, especially if you are a relationship newbie or still recovering from a train-wreck break up.

“Communication is still so important despite your relationship not having a label or a specific direction, so just be honest with yourself and the other person.”

Francesca Ferragni

So, here’s the deal, do you want to keep stumbling around in the dark, forever wondering, or do you want to grab the bull by the horns and take charge of your love life like Francesca did?

So, take off the band aid, maybe grab some tequila shots for added bravery (responsibly, of course), and ask your situationship where things stand between you two.

Are you the one they want to introduce to their dear mom back home in the south, or are you just a side character in their chapter that will just add to the plot.

Who knows, you might unveil the answer you’ve been searching for and become official, or you could gracefully part ways.

Either way, remember that life is short, people are temporary, so why not live with no regrets? Ask that question, and no matter what the answer is, slay like a queen that you are. It’s you love life, own it.

Edited by Audrey Chow and Ramona Gabriela Toderascu

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