My Tinder Date Stole My AirPods

by | May 25, 2023 | Out of the Closet

You gotta love dating apps, especially when your Tinder date keeps refusing to give back the AirPods you left at their house. Like Jesus, it’s like you are waiting for them to pop the big question.

I went on a Tinder date with this boy, let’s call him Will. The date was amazing, he was lovely, the chemistry was there, the looks were definitely there, and he offered to pay, which added double points to him. Don’t come at me, but the bar is so low these days.

Anyways, from one drink to another, we went back to his place and continued the night there. It’s fair to say more points were added to the list that night.

Now, I’m more of a person who goes with the flow, I hate forcing things if I don’t feel them, and with Will, there was chemistry, but not much connection. So, something serious to happen was out of the window, mainly because he was doing a master’s and was leaving soon.

So, when I woke up the next day, I was ready to get the fuck out of there just to avoid the “It’s not you, it’s me, the sex was great but I’m just not feeling it” talk. I’m an early bird, which I thank God every day for since it saved me a lot of awkward encounters the next day after a date. So, bibbidi, bobbidi, boo, you keep sleeping and I fuck out of the room.

From his to mine was probably like 10 to 15-minute walk, and since it was 8 am, no one had to witness my walk of shame, or as I like to call it walk of fame.

As I was walking up the hill I realised something, my AirPods were missing. Doing a 360 spin looking for those little cubic white shits, I realised that I left them on his shelf.

Fuck my life! Like, do I go back? What do I even say? ‘Hey, can you let me in? why am I outside? Oh, I didn’t wanna wake you up. Or more like, I didn’t want to see your face, one night was enough. But oh well, I had to put my big girl panties on and text him.

He replied a few hours later, saying that I could go over whenever with a wink face. He probably thought I did it on purpose for me to have a reason to go back. And I can’t blame him, been there, done that. However, that was not the case with him. I desperately needed my AirPods.

In the evening I went over and guess what, he was not home. He said to go the next day as he’d be home then. However, that turned into two weeks without me listening to my music on the way to uni. Like I actually had to listen to my own thoughts for the first time in a while and trust me, them fuckers are restless.

One day I saw him on the other side of the street with guess what, my fucking AirPods in his ears. “Maybe those are his AirPods”… I gave him the benefit of the doubt. But then I realised, he has a freaking Samsung.

So I asked him again when I could go over and take my AirPods back. His response? ‘Sorry, I’m at work right now.’ Well, he was definitely not at work I can guarantee you that. But he did say I could go and get them in the evening, which I did, thanks fuck for that.

My AirPods and I were finally reunited.

So, to all my dating app users out there, be careful what you leave behind, it might take you a while to get it back if you ever do.

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